This is Jeff and I gots to take a HUGE SHIT. I bet its gonna be smelly and runny. After I wipe I'm gonna lick it and taste it. I bet it tastes GOOD. I hope it has a lil blood in it too.

What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

Did you know Hellen Keller had a tree house? No Neither did she

Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant?

Hey, we're both lawyers.

why was the man masturbating? his wife needed a break

Women Voting

The 19th Amendment

Your mother is so fat, that the doctor said, "Go on a diet or you will get a Cardiac Infarction."

the website says jokes, yet these are all facts.

whats the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

I used to be an adventurer like you. Then i took an arrow to the knee.

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? To end her misery.

What did the Atheist say in church? His best friend's eulogy.

Nero, I understand, what I thought was correct, was to teach people to understand those exact words that you are conveying. Its not that, I am afraid of showing the world the man that I am. But rather that I am not a man, I admire your vision, and tried to follow it, as we got much in, common, I can think as an individual and still admire your work. But you know how society is built, if too many find out I am a woman, then that not only reveals that I have been lying to them, which I have, but also that well, women are not exactly seen as equals, I know I never was, all people ever saw in me was "a great pair of tits".

A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender picks up a newspaper and squishes him

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the World Chicken Road Crossing Competition.

Y did a fat woman cross the rode? To get to McDonalds

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? -getting raped by 10 very hung men who go balls deep

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She didn't have any arms.

Who am I? Your name is Harvey Jackson. Let's get you dressed so we can go downstairs for dinner. Nurse Holland will be helping you in a few moments.

Why couldn't the basketball player jump anymore? Because he broke his back.

Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme coffee table.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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