how do u get a nun pregnant? dress her up as an alter boy

A woman walks out of the kitchen.

CHICKEN it is a chickenly chickeny food we eat WRONG

What do you call a car with no wheels or engine? Immobile

whats funny ? not you i am telling the joke around here

why is the asian still in the driveway? her car broke down

Q: Why do Japanese people have eyes that look like they're stretched to the side of their head? A: When they are born, they come out head first, and their eyes are stretched to the side of their head and are stuck in that position due to the sticky, glue like substance found inside a woman's stomach.

How do you catch a unique rabbit? You could probably find many of them in the vicinity of Chernobyl. The radiation has probably created thousands of mutations. They are probably not as fast as regular rabbits.

knock! knock! whos there!?! abandoned baby!

Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. That would never happen because penguins would not be anywhere near a bath-tub at any point in their lives, I would be more concerned wondering why a penguin is in the US and calling animal control than making up a joke about it.

What object do bananas look like? Bananas.

What did my mom get for christmas? My dad, Dick in a box. My dad's name is Richard.

knock knock? whos there? eatmop. eatmopwho? HAHAHAH EAT MY POO

Terrance was going to clean his room but then he got high, do you know why? because terrance is addicted to illicit street drugs and should seek medical help.

Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

what's red and blue? your heart

What is the saddest episode on tv ever? The live broadcast of the World Trade Center being destroyed.

I just flew in from New York and boy are my arms tired. I was jerking off during the entire plane ride.

what do you do if you wake up at midnight and your tv is floating? -call the police because you caught a burgler in the act of stealing your tv

Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

Your mom is so fat, you might be dyslexic

How did the kid drop his ice he got hit by a train Griffin Cholette

Did you hear about the boy who got an AM radio? It took him a month to realize that he can play it at night too.

Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 raped and murdered 8.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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