roses are red violets are blue i took your cup to the bathroom ...thats not really apple juice:)

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, animals can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Knock knock Who's there? 7. And if that's you in there, 6, you better start praying.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A boat drowns in the middle of the water. Everyone dies except for an Asian guy. Why did he live? Because he could swim.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

I've got a shotgun with two bullets. I've got two enemies. What do I do with the gun? Go bird hunting.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did Susie fall off the swing - because she had no arms Knock Knock Who is it Not Susie

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti jokes gives me cold sores

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Being a demigod and slaying monsters isn't normal, but on myth it is. MYTH: Not even once.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

The awkward moment when a joke doesn't end the way you think it dinosaur.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why is there no African food restaurants in America? Because Africa doesnt have food to begin with

thumb_up thumb_down +26

How do you get a giraffe in a fridge? Open the Door, put the giraffe in, close the door How do you get an elephant in a fridge Open the door, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, close the door There is an animal meeting, one animal doesn't show up. Which animal didn't come? The Elephant, it's still in the fridge You come across a crocodile infested river, how do you get across? You swim across, the crocodiles are at the meeting, Weren't you listening?

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why'd Sally fall of the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not sally

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the woman cross the road? She didn't. They are no roads in the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic child.? DAMN

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What did the town guard say to the adventurer? "I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I got a full-time job so that I could support my family and spend more time with my children."

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A guy walks into a bar. He puts an icepack on his head so it doesn't swell, and decides to go out for a drink. He walks into a bar and thinks to himself, "that's twice today, maybe I should just go home."

thumb_up thumb_down +24

how did hitler fit 100 Jews in his car??? he couldn't, his car only fits 5 people.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Roses are red Violets are blue In Soviet Russia They had communism

thumb_up thumb_down +24

roses are red violets are black i hope your chest is not as flat as your back.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Pickles

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the seal get confused when a spider tried to high five him? Because spiders have eight legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A black guy and a white guy are arguing over what race god is. So they go to god and ask what race he is. He says, "I am what I am." The white guy says, "yes." The black guy says, "why did you say yes?" If he was black he would have said, "I is what I is.":):):):):):):):)<3

thumb_up thumb_down +22

People are like cats, they both die when they're suffocated

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops