Whats worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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A: Knock knock (pause) A: Knock knock (pause) A: Knock knock B: (frustrated), I thought we had that damn thing fixed!!!

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There is a white man, a black guy, and an Asian in a car. It got into an accident who did it? Asian dude

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for nothing? black

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why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad. salads can't fly planes.

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Did you hear about the man who didn't get a burger with his meal?! Yes he is doing quite well on his diet don't you agree?

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What do you call a row of houses that are all different size? A poorly thought out construction project that has enraged townspeople.

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School : Todays lesson, 1 + 1 = 2 Exam, find the radius of the sun

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What's worse than dropping your sandwich. Dying of pancreatic cancer.

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What's better than winning a medal in the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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Sit on Santas lap Boner

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Children playing GTA......... what a world of rapists

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Wats a joke?

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Out on the playground of a school, extremely young kids are acting as living witness to an audacious thing. They're watching a very interesting display of strength and brutality. They're observing a enactment of lofty potential and great might. What're they watching? They're regarding their principal getting promptly arrested by the federal police for possession of technically illegal weaponry including, but not only limited to what looked like to them: peculiar "fire crackers" and reloadable "candy dispensers". In the ensuing battle, their principal got shot in the arm and a random pedestrian got killed by a stray bullet. In the end, the cruel joke's on them. Guess what? They're irrepairably damaged for the rest of their life.

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What did the man bring home from Africa? AIDS.

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what did the lawyer say to the lawyer? "whats up lawyer?" what did the banana say to the banana? nothing bananas dint talk...

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A Priest in a Rabbi walk into a bar. They talk about religion.

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How many pieces of bling does it take to ruin a rap song? Just Two Chainz

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DON'T expect the unexpected, you don't want to KILL the unexpected ;-)

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What would Martin Luther King Jr. be today if he was white? Alive.

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Q: What did the casual mathematician discover at the end of his vivid rainbow of dreams (Question mark- key`s screwed) A: Enough dirt to fill 3141592+ treasure chests to the brim.

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A recently engaged couple are having sex. The man finishes in just under 3 minutes as usual. The woman then says "I love you" because they've been together for over 2 years and they care for each other very deeply.

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What was the beauty pageant contestant with a bladder control problem told by the judges? You’re an 8.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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