Grandma got ran over by a reindeer. She died.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Out of all the sadness and death in the world...do you know what the worst part is? Mexicans are still hoping the border...

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was blind and deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A blond and a redhead are walking down the street the red head says look a dead bird the blond looks up

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What is funnier than 9 black fellas dead in a trashbin? 1 black fella dead in 9 trashbins.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is next?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why are black people good at basketball? They practice

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How did Ronald McDonald die? He was hit by a big mac

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing. Fruits can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

a dude goes to vegas and loses his money, the moral of the story is not to trust the internet this story was written by The Internet

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: What did Mr. Spock say when Captain Kirk was raping him? A: "Ouch! Ouch! Captain, this is so illogical!"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man walks into a bar. He says ow

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wish you were here, To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock Knock Come in. Come in who? You're a dumbass.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How Do You Get Your Mom To Shut up? You Kill Her.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

your a towel.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why didn't the chicken get to the other side of the road? Because chickens are in farms

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Clement: Hey love. Want to go out on a date? Patience: No. Clement: That's all right. Your agreement is not needed. *Clement ties up Patience's hands and feet, gags her and puts her in the back of his meat delivery van. He is planning to throw her into the sewers.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

how did the turtle die? it drowned itself

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Women's Rights

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did Mulan say to Pocohantas? Nothing as they are nothing but fictional creation of the childish (yet genius); minds of the Disney corporation. Although if they were capable of empathy (which isn't likely) then they would still, say nothing, as they are from two completely different movies.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worst that the Holocaust? Another one.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops