What's orange and doesn't bounce? A flat basketball

3 people walk into a bar. They order the same drinks. Upon receiving these drinks, they all promptly left. This is not a funny joke.

A fish swims up stream for his anual spawning season The fish dies from a heart attack because of the rigorous that took place.

I am not racist, racism is a crime! Crime is for black people.

You might be a redneck if you are from a rural area and act as such.

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One of them I can whack with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Its a chicken, giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

What's worse than being swallowed by a blue whale? Being swallowed by a bule whale with herpes.

whats the difference between a rapist and a pedophile? the racist has his own whistle

What did batman say to the Joker? I'm Batman

How do you piss off a female archeologist? Kill her dog.

Q: How do you fit 20 babies into a bowl? A: A blender. Q: How do you get them out? A: Tortilla chips.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To go fishing.

Chuck norris walked into a bar. He went up to the bartender, clenched his fists and gave him some money

Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

How many teenagers does it take to change a light? 1. Unless he has some sort of disablity then probably 2.

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O too.” Then he dies.

Roses are red Violets are blue Billy is dead and Atom bombs blow up chines $

Why was the black man running away from the cops? He was running a relay race.

Two muffins are in an oven. It was a really small batch.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

Why was Sally a bad driver? Because she rarely signals and never checked her blind spots.

a seal walks into a bar. replace "bar" with "club". and replace "walks into" with "gets bludgeon by."

A duck walks into a bar, the bartender asks "What'd you want?" the duck responds "A miller lite please" promptly after that the bartender was tested for mental insanity because he thinks ducks can talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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