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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow You thought that this would be romantic, but alas, it is only gardening facts

What has 7 mouths 3 eyes and 5 noses Something very ugly

Q: How do you get a kleenex to dance? A: Put a little boogey in it!

Why can't Tommy the T-Rex clap? Because dinosaurs have been extinct for 65 Million years.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, flotaing in the sea? Someone who will drown very soon.

What would people call Michael Jackson if he became president? Probably President Jackson

Q: What's worse than burning your tongue on hot chocolate. A: Getting shanked by a homeless man

want to go home? yea

What did the Canadian Goose say to the Snow Goose? You're white.

Whats the different between a black man and white man...... the different levels melanin in the skin that results in pigment

Justin Bieber paid a donation to the anti-homosexual orginization.

Why did the manager fire his black employee? Because he was stealing office supplies. Why was he stealing office supplies? Because he needed the money for his family. Why did he need that money? Because he wasn't being paid his full wage. Why wasn't he being paid full wage? Because his employer was a racist. Upon this analysis, the state of California ruled the case of Jones vs. Smith in favour of Mr. Jones, and ordered Mr. Smith to give Mr. Jones a cash settlement of $500,000. However, Mr. Jones was still convicted with a single charge of petty theft and was sentenced to six months in prison. His family was still awarded the settlement of $500,000. Mr. Jones made parole three months early for being an "idol inmate."

What's better than a gold medal in the special olympics? ICE CREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

what did the monkey say to the breast cancer?

alert('hiiii');

I feel like am motherf***ing stuck in this dock and it makes me wana quack like what the hell is THAT!

Q: What did the ugly duckling say to the other ducks? A: QUACK!

What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

Q: What did one poor guy say to the other poor guy? A: We're both black

Why do people play video games? Because audio games are not as fun.

What's big, red and eats rocks? A big, red Rock-Eater

If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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