whats worse than bitting into a apple a finding a worm? bitting into ur apple an finding out u have just killed noddy who was hiding in ur apple

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I was purple once. I took a shower later that day.

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Beauty is only skin deep Well of course it is, muscles, bones and tissues look disgusting.

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There is a secret society known as Grandma Elbow. What happened to the boy who tried to leave it? All of his limbs were ripped off and fed to a man eating shark by the name of Nigel Tommy Baker. It didn't hurt that much because the boy was forced into eating the waste products of a donkey before this happened. NEVER LEAVE GRANDMA ELBOw!

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h

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What are the black specks in birdshit called? That's birdshit too.

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What did the devil say to the baby with four arms? I am evil.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dwayne. Ok... come in.

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who is lanky? Theo Kingdom

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A Horse walks into a Bar The Bartender runs for his life as he is tripping on acid and believes the horse is a sheep. He doesn't like sheep.

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what do you call a black man named mike

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An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

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Chuck Norris died.

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Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

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Why did the black guy smell so bad? Because he accidently jumped into a pool of garbage disposal.

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if I was a girl I would be touching my self everywhere if I was a girl as a boy I would make a diffrence in poltics but thats not gonna happen.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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If god gives you lemons You find a new god.

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So a disabled man walks into a bar...

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was hit by a large refrigerator Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? The two of them were stapled together Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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Where did Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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What's small, yellow and great with numbers? A yellow calculator

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If you added up all of the grains of sand in all the beaches of the world, how many would there be? Anyone?

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What's the difference between a rooster and a waffle iron? A lot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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