Whats lemon scented and you shouldn't drink? Bleach

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Did you hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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Yo' momma's so fat, she has an increased risk of cardiovascula disease and may die.

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what did the banana say to the apple i dont know because bananas dont talk

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What did the wise old widow across the street get for Hanukkah? Cardiac Arrest.

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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GRAAAAAAAAAAAR.

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Roses are gray Violets are gray I am a dog

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Why can't Stevie Wonder drive? There is no steering wheel at the back of the bus.

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? Most things, as the Holocaust was a terrible tragedy.

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Knock knock! Who's there? This. This who? This joke.

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Yo' Mama so nice that she donated a kidney and saved a life

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Why did the cookie go to the docter? Because he was dieing of terminal cancer.

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Womens rights

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How did the semen cross the road I put on the wrong sock this morning

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How big is Justin Bieber's penis? 10 inches, and its in his ass, and its actually Usher's penis

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Wikipedia has no entry on "gullibility."

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One time I went into a haunted house. It was just pretend ghosts but then I saw a real ghost there. It was scary.

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1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

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What does an Irishman order at the bar?? A beer

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A man is driving home from work. he realizes he left his suitcase back at the office. he turns around and drives back to the office. he walks in the office and grabs his suitcase, and as he's walking out he's stopped by his boss. his boss simply asks "what are you doing in the office at this time, Eric?" the man replies to his boss " sorry sir i was just grabbing my suitcase as i forgot to bring it as i was leaving work" his boss lets him pass " okay Eric, have a good night" the man get back in his car and drives home. but on his way home a pedestrian runs in front of the road. the man runs him over unintentionly. the man is jailed with manslaughter for 4 and a half years

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(Knock Knock) Who's there? You were late paying your mortgage and now your house is being repossessed by the bank.

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I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

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How do you kill a fly? Shoot it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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