YOU IS DUM

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A man comes home early from work to find that his wife is in bed with another man, startled by his presence the wife quickly utters 'it's not what it looks like", the husband however, disregards this comment and later files for a divorce

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Immediately following his inauguration, Bush called Obama into the oval office for a private meeting and some words of advice. Bush and Obama shook hands as gentlemen do and then Bush asked if Obama wanted to hear a joke. Obama eagerly said yes, "Good..." Bush said, handing Obama a battered copy of the United States Constitution, "...the joke is in your hands", and with that Bush turned and left.

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what do you do if a blonde throws you a grenade. scream. run. hide

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what do you do if you wake up at midnight and your tv is floating? -call the police because you caught a burgler in the act of stealing your tv

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.

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A man drinks a java while using Java His java was hot, making him spill on his laptop Blue screen of death

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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So there was a pirate, he got shot in the back. And when he got shot he turned to his freind (fellow pirate) and said i have been shot and there is a pretty good chance i will die.

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A man entered into a house, because it hadn't any door.

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GAY PEOPLE

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"I have some pretty bad news for you, but to ease into it, I will try to work it into a conversation." -Alright Doctor, let's try that." "Hey, how are you feeling today?" -"I feel great!" "That's odd, because you have leukemia..."

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What do you call a bay that got run over by a train? Thomas

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Your mother is so fat that I'm starting to worry about her health.

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How do you starve colored people? deny them food stamps

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Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

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why couldnt the gay man marry??? cause he was dead.

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An Englishmen, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar, and ordered a beer. They later went home and slept. They woke up the next morning with a slight hangover.

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knock knock, who's there? you goodbye

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Knock knock (No one is home)

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into an apple and slicing your mouth on a razorblade

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A baby seal walks into a club. And is brutally murdered for a hunting round.

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What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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