so he says "aaahhh". then i threw a fridge at him

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One time I went into a haunted house. It was just pretend ghosts but then I saw a real ghost there. It was scary.

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Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

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why did the mans hair start to get shorter the barber was shaving it!

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knock,knock who's there? the postman didn't answer as he is deaf

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Q: What is green, blue, white and red? A: They're colors

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why did the guy drop his umbrella........ because he was getting raped.

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Amputations.

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What do you call all of the skin around the vagina? a women

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what did the boy from a computer recycling unit in china get on his birthday? Pancreatic cancer.

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i'm on the sea food diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Pen. Pen who? Pen is blue. The pen is blue. THE GOD DAMN PEN IS BLUE!!!!

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What do you call a helicopter above Hawaii? A helicopter.

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Roses are red Violets are blue What was I saying? Oh yeah, your adopted.

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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Three kids are standing on a corner. They have red hair, blue hair, and green hair respectively. A man asks the kid with red hair "How did you get your hair red?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man then asks the kid with blue hair, "How did you get your hair blue?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man finally asks the kid with green hair, "How did you get your hair green?" The kid wipes his hand across his nose, gathering green slime and replies, "I dyed it."

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Wats wet and salty and people on the west coast get covered in it? Sweat.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue.

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what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

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THere was three bees eating Honeynut cherrios one of them had a speech impediment.

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What's Funnier than this joke? Lee Evans

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What did the hooker get for christmas? Herpes

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The only hand that can beat a royal flush is Chuck Norris's hand

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Rebecca Black

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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