what do you call someone who kills jews? a life saver

q: Why does my grandpa climbs a phone pole with a bag of bananas? a: He likes to climb and he might get hungry.

Will gropes Ebola victims

Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Here comes a car, It ran over m--

Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock WHAT THE F*** DO YOU WANT?!?!?!?! Oh, well then nevermind

What does a Jew do when he sees a masked man at his door? He grabs a phone to alert the police and hides in his bedroom.

Why didn't the boy finish his homework? He was in a coma.

What does a person that is fasting get for Christmas? Food.

Roses are red Violets are blue Its just a bulge I swear its not a bomb

An Irishman, a Mexican and an American sit a test. They all pass.

Q. Why did the man fall off his bike? A. He was hit by a canoe.

Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.forty-two

A woman goes to the hospital to receive an ultra-sound after taking a pregnancy test a few weeks before. The doctor comes out and says "Congratulations Susanne would you like to know the results? Susanne says "No thank you." Then, the doctor says "Good, because its actually a retarded baby that we found."

Who's the cutest girl in the world? Claire Seiter.

Why Was my mommy gone last night? -cause I ****ed her

Your Momma is so ugly, she got plastic surgery.

Flab

"Knock Knock" "Who's There?" "Sara" "Come in, we will have a cup of coffee in the good company of each other."

Q: What did the ugly duckling say to the other ducks? A: QUACK!

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by a truck

Why did the cow have to travel everywhere by an electric scooter? It had motor neurone disease.

What's the difference between a zebra and a newspaper? Everything.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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