Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cancer.

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What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, but doesn't look like a duck? A horse named Quackie

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Life is like a box of chocolates, it doesn't last as long for fat people...

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-Hey, Larry! How much is one plus one? -Two

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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What's the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Holy ****, I'm in heaven.

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What's (333x4)-198+(456x100,432)-10+5? Bet ya said i don't know! I don't either.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Dead Babies

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Why did the woman make a sandwich? She was hungry

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms. They were lost in a tractor accident.

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knock knock whos there .. derp

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What's worse than a good anti-joke? A bad anti-joke.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a large dog on its side of the road attempting to harass it.

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knock knock, who's there, white, white who, white van, RUN!

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Why didn't the boy finish his homework? He was in a coma.

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What does a Jew do when he sees a masked man at his door? He grabs a phone to alert the police and hides in his bedroom.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

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If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

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What's the difference between a Elephant? It can neither bike...

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What's better than winning at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Nipples+poop= good stuff. Hellllll yeaaahhhh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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