Alright, if you guess it right, I'll stop playing Mario and finish my division problems. Okay, Mom, call it in the air! Heads or Tails? Huntington's Disease is the reason your Father doesn't remember your name anymore, Billy. There's a fifty percent chance you'll end up with it too. I am so sorry. Also, Tails.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

What are the things that define you? The things that define you.

Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a convicted rapist.

Robocop and T-800 where fighting, first the T-800 manages to injure Robocop critically, but Robocop manages to repair himself and break T-800`s legs off, which T-800 suddenly regrows due to an unexpected upgrade. After several hours of combat, where civilians are injured and half the town is destroyed they where both worn out, but ready for one last struggle... ...Eventually there was a great celebration for whoever won.

A scottish and a mexican were walking on the streets when the mexican got hit by a car. The scottish man called the ambulance and walkked away.

How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

What's white and sticky? A sticky polar bear.

whos a tramp and stinks? David Bell

Humpty Dumpty didn't fall I pushed him

You won't put that in your ass.... No shit.

Why couldn't the mexican feed his family? Because a large percent of mexican immigrants in the United States do not have jobs due to dicrimination against illegal immigrants crossing the soutern border, thus rendering them more vunerable to unemployment is that is vastly present in the United States.

why was the little girl crying? because she was molested

A woman refuses to make a sandwich and walks away unharmed.

What do chicken babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

Why did the japanese bomb pearl harbor? they wanted to weaken the US naval fleet to stop the US embargo on oil being shipped to japan

obama is a good president

Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

A blonde girl walks into a screen door. She is blind.

A duck walks into a bar, the bartender asks "What'd you want?" the duck responds "A miller lite please" promptly after that the bartender was tested for mental insanity because he thinks ducks can talk.

A guy is playing cod

Why did the Vietnemese prostitute ask for the phone? Because she wanted to use the phone.

Why did the Jew ask for a napkin? something funny about the holocaust

Roses are red, violets are blue, cheeseburger.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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