What's worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into an apple and slicing your mouth on a razorblade

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What's brown and sticky? -A stick.

Roses are brown, violets are brown, who keeps shitting in my garden?

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

What did the wise old widow across the street get for Hanukkah? Cardiac Arrest.

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the bird

Which way do gay people walk? in One Direction

John:Why couldn't the T-Rex clay his hands? Billy:Because his arms are too small! John:no he's extinct dumbass

Why was the little kid bullied? Because his name was Hugh Jass.

First kid: my name is bob second kid: ok First kid: Now tell me what my name is?? second kid: bob First kid: HOW did you know???

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Q: What's worse than 10 dead babies in a tree? A: I'm sure there are lots of things.

1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

How big is Justin Bieber's penis? 10 inches, and its in his ass, and its actually Usher's penis

What is brown and sticky?

You know what isn't funny? AIDS. You know what is? Brittany Spears with AIDS...

cms.......?????

You know what's annoying When you suddenly die of a heart attack

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

A really hot girl walks past 2 guys and the following conversation is produced... Guy1:damn! look at that ass! Guy2:yep I bet shit comes from that thing! When's the last time she had diarrhea?!

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

Roses are blue, Roses are red. Give me your money, Or I'll cut off your head.

Have you heard the story of the empty room? Theres nothing in it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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