How do you find the population of Mexico? You take a census count by mail and/or a door to door questionnaire.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

What did Sarah Palin say to her daughter on Christmas? Merry Christmas

Why couldn't the young boy go trick or treating? He was a diabetic.

roses are red, violets are blue, I talk to myself, and so do it I.

How do you find Nemo? Watch the movie.

what is fat and ugly. fat and ugly people

Why the girl fell from the swing? cause she had no arms

What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? Peanut butter is a food paste made primarily from dry roasted peanuts, while jam is a product made with whole fruit, that is cut into pieces or crushed.

What Starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn.

You know what's annoying When you suddenly die of a heart attack

roses are red violets are blue i dont really care about you

Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

whats the difference between a nigga and a bucket of shit? the bucket

What's the difference between Mitt Romney and a cheese grader? How the hell should i know?

How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

Q: what's black, white and red all over A: a penguin in a blender

Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

what is black and white and red all over a shot to death zebra

A Mexican, A Jew and a Irishman walk into a grocery store...The Mexican buys some bread, the Jew buys some bread... and the Irishman buys some bread.

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Who was worse than Hitler? Justin Bieber

What do you call a former pope. Dead!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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