What did the blind man do in the dark room? Nothing, he couldn't see.

cms.......?????

what do you call a Ukranian woman without a visa? my maid

It is green and it is attached to a fence? Green paint

Jacob Black and Edward Cullen show up at your house. You tell your best girl friend and she has you admitted to a psych ward because everyone knows they are fictional characters!

How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Goofy sold Pluto into slavery in exchange for the power of human speech.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? The Mexican is alive and the park bench isn't.

Johnson stops eating

So there is 10 Nazis and a monkey the rest doesn't matter but i farted...

Why did Dave not hug his wife? Because she looked horrifying from the Iraq war.

What do you call a Mexican man in prison? A prison officer.

whats worse than your brother dying in a car accident? finding out the rest of your family was in there

Q: what's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

Why did Tommy cry? His tear glands emptied out of his eyes

What did the racist slave owner do when his slave refused to complete his task? Asked him nicely until the task was completed.

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

Stevie wonder walks across the road without looking both ways.

Why don`t women need watches? Because in our modern society, there are many clocks in most locations.

What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? One is a popular Italian food and the other is a human being.

How many rats live in a llamas stomach? the cats pajamas

what is the difference between a black person and a picnic bench? A picnic bench can support a family.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because once it had inadvertently escaped the farm it was being kept on it was startled and with no concept of road and pavement happened to traverse a road, with no real motive.

Knock knock Who's there Ummmm....me u r looking right at me O yeah Ummm... Now what U knocked? No. O Ye Ok Alright cya

I said I read te terms of service. I didnt

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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