Why don't women need watches? Because they have clocks on their cell phones because they have jobs outside of the house and are INDEPENDENT WOMEN! MEN DO NOT DEFINE THEM!

Yo momma so fat, people snicker as they walk past her, quietly laughing at a women obviously struggling with obesity. They then proceed to stop laughing, as they realize that their mother died from diabetes. They then proceed to move on with their day.

If youve ever seen the wizard of oz movie and family guy, then u get what i mean. Hes a PHONY! a BIG FAT PHONY!

What did the mother say to her baby? These little piggies taste good!

a priest a rabbi and a minister all walk into a bar and the bartender says "is this a joke?"

whats more serious than rape... the holocaust

¸Knock Knock whos there Penis penis who your family has penis cancer

A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

Why didn't the depressed girl go on facebook? She was dead

One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

You play the piano? What more can you do? Sounds complicated but try me.

What do you call a black man driving a car? A driver.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

1. 2. 3. 4. 5.

yo mama's so sexy... wait, thats not how it goes

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. why did the frog fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the monkey,

what do you call a stupid chav? Gifted

What is the most common cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

Hey, do you want to play the r.a.p.e game ? NO! That's the spirit

Vagina-Boob

Why did the dog go in the bar? Because the door was left open

What do you call a horse, a cow, a pig, a sheep, a dog, a cat, and a mouse all walking in a straight line? Animals

What did the parrot say to the cow? Moo

how do you say desk in spanish? escritorio

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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