What's the difference between a Jew and a black person? Black people are good at running.

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you mother is so stupid that it takes her quite a while to understand jokes

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Yo mama so stupid she stole free bread.

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What is brown and sticky?

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane. A pilot

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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What do you call a Mexican who gets shot on a golf course? A tragic incident.

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Babies are like landmines; when you step on them they explode.

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so he says "aaahhh". then i threw a fridge at him

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Roses are red Violets are blue This line doesn't rhyme Neither does this one.

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What was the dying Raccoons last words? I don't want to die.

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Why do cows have tails? Because my pet rock stopped breathing.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What's meaner than taking a candy from a baby? Tossing the baby of a cliff

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What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

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What did one guy say to the other guy?? Well he just hi but hi backwards is ih and that reminded him of his days in Nahm because that's what his Sargent said and that reminded him of ice-cream because his Sargent smelled like ice-cream and that reminded him of the song that the ice-cream played which reminded him of Disney world which reminded him of a priest raping little boys which mad him laugh because that reminded him of a Jew picking up a penny which reminded him of Osama be shot in the f**k**g face and that reminded him to say how are you to the other guy.

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What kind of parrot can't mimic human voices? One that's just had it's vocal chords illegally harvested and sold on the black market

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I like my coffee like I like my women Without a penis

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Jokes are funny.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because once it had inadvertently escaped the farm it was being kept on it was startled and with no concept of road and pavement happened to traverse a road, with no real motive.

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so a guy says to his doctor "it hurts when i touch my leg" the doctor replies "but we cut it of last week" he promptly died with an infection in his leg

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Why did jack smell smoke in his neighborhood? His house burnt to the ground.

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Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, Everything's Grey, I am a Dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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