One time a man cut off Chuck Norris while driving, and Chuck Norris kindly excused the man's lack of consideration for his fellow drivers.

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What's worse than the titanic sinking 9-11

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What did the Queen of England say when here servant died? Another one bites the dust!

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A man yells at the top of the Grand Canyon, "Heyoooooo" He hears His voice echo multiple times. He yells again, "Heyoooooo" This time he hears his echo and a girl yell "heyo" back to him from within the canyon. He looks down. He falls. A mountain goat breaks his fall. The man is so thankful for the goat. He says, " Thank you goat! You saved my life!" The goat then pulls out a gun, and shoots him thrice. The man dies.

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What's worse than throwing 8 babies off a cliff? Throwing 1 baby off a cliff.

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Why didn't the man kiss his wife. Because he had no lips.

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How do you kill a blonde? lightsabre to the throat should do it

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Why did the man known to his neighbors as 'Teetotal Al' buy himself a bottle of whisky? Because there was no factual basis to his nickname.

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Why didn't the depressed girl go on facebook? She was dead

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

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Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll probably just land back on earth.

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Someone told me about this website.

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Two guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would've noticed and avoided it.

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Two gay men in a hottub. They relaxed for about half an hour before getting out and going to the bed, where they fell asleep.

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Penis in a box.

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What did the rape victim say to the rapist? "mmfff...mmm.....mmmmm"

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Women's rights.

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Did you see the blind man get hit by a car? Neither did he.

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What is the most common cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

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why did the baby cross the road...? cause he was chained to my bumper

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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Knock knock, Knock knock jokes aren't funny.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Satan. Oh **** go away.

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What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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