Lightening never strikes the same place twice. But it killed both my parents.

What's the best joke of all? YOUR SOCIAL LIFE!!!!!!!

Knock knock Whose there? you you who you know who you are

knock knock, who's there? you goodbye

Why did the dog run away from home? His house burned down and his owners were killed.

What is a girl with one leg called ( iliene )

Did you hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

Knock, Knock! Who's there? Matt. Matt, who? You're friend Matt that you texted twenty minutes ago telling me to come over.

What did the little boy find when he came home from school? His mother hanging from a tree.

hi

whats worse than the halocaust? disney channel.

a little girl gets raped

Romney 2012

why did hannibal lector butter up the teacher? he wanted to get a good grade. he also wanted to eat her

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

*Hands women baby* Women: Hes so beatiful! I'm going to love him forever! Doctor: Its not yours, yours died.

What's meaner than taking a candy from a baby? Tossing the baby of a cliff

What's brown, hairy and goes up and down? A kiwifruit in an elevator.

Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

Why was the woman convicted or arson? She set her house on fire. Why did she set her house on fire? Her husband was beating her.

What is brown and sticky?

Jokes are funny.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

First kid: my name is bob second kid: ok First kid: Now tell me what my name is?? second kid: bob First kid: HOW did you know???

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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