Whats helped us not be mad at Osama Binladen. His death.

thumb_up thumb_down +97

1+1=3 If you don't use a condom.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

Life is like a box of chocolates. You eat them. get fat. Die.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

why did the 8 year old want a squirt gun? his parents were on fire

thumb_up thumb_down +55

how do you fit 100 jews in a car? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back seat, and 95 in the ash tray.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What do you call three black men in a car? One driver, and two passengers.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

A priest, a rabbi and a captain are in a sinking ship. The rabbi says let's save the children. The captain says f*ck the children. The priest days do we have time.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

the chicken whent boomand then died

thumb_up thumb_down +47

A priest, a rabbi, and an atheist walk into a bar. They sit down and have a calm discussion about the differences in their beliefs.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

what did the clinically depressed man last post on twitter? "Oh cruel world, i finally lost all faith in the good of humanity. I am unloved and irrelevant to all. I know nobody will miss me, but goodbye anyway. #suicide " nobody followed him and saw the post and he died alone with nobody at his funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Two muffins were in an oven. Neither of them said anything because they are inanimate objects. After they were finished baking, they were pulled out and set to cool on a counter to be eaten at a later time.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with large genitalia.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did the chicken cross the road? His motives so far are unknown as he is a chicken, and therefor cannot divulge the information.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

why did bully fall of his bike He was eaten by a fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +41

whats stupid and likes dumb jokes? you.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

ps3

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why was the orphan crying? His parents were dead and his future was uncertain.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the thief steal the kitchen sink? Everything else was stolen by another thief earlier in the day.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What happens when you mix 3 pounds of baking soda, 2 dozen cans of Mr. Pibb cola, and a live tortoise? It makes a terrible mess and your wife gets upset at you for getting the house so dirty. She refuses to clean it up.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Roses are red. Violets are red. Everything is red. I soaked it in the blood of small children.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

what do you call a slave with a dream of being free? whatever his name happens to be

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Q: Whatcha doin?? A:Ur mom. . .

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops