What do you call a hickey on your shoulder? Bad aim -Cooper Simpson

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the terrorist have for breakfast? Scrambled eggs and a glass of orange juice.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Knock Knock. Whose there? Not your dead mom.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

thumb_up thumb_down +24

i want to eat a horse out jaffa cake

thumb_up thumb_down +22

lol

thumb_up thumb_down +22

An asian walks out of math class

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did Billy fall down? Because his brain was replaced with a piece of toast.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock Knock. Shut up.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's the difference between Jews and boy scouts? Boy scouts come back from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why is the boy severely mentally scarred? He got raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a muslim behind the controls of an airliner? A pilot you rascist.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What is brown, smells like shit and on fire? A muslim after the bomb vest malfuctioned!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Mitt Romney for president.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a Colombian who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Knock knock. Who's there? President. President who? The President of the United States.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

"Your moms so fat I jiggled my pickle and she jumped with tortoise." Is what I would say if I was retarded. Downvote this shiz!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A Mormon walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why was Six afraid of Seven? During the crossover episode of Blossom and Star Trek: Voyager. Six traveled ahead to the distant future and found herself on the aforementioned starship. Her situation was confusing and frightening, even more so when the half-female, half-Borg appeared before her.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the Queen of England say when here servant died? Another one bites the dust!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What happened to the black man when his alarm went off? He got up and took a shower. Then he got dressed and went to church because it was Sunday.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

whats the difference between a snail? - both legs are the same lenght, especially the left one.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what did the joke say to the anti-joke? do you want to fight

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops