What's faster than a Mexican running away with your T.V.? An Airplane

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what do you call four black people in a red sleeping bag? -a very snug sleeping bag as they can rarely fit more then one person comfortably

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender brings him the beer, and the man drinks it. Then the man dies in a car crash while driving back to his family

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Whats the difference between peanut butter and jam? I can't peanut butter my dick into someones ass

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What do you get a black guy when he is hungry? Something edible.

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How do Jewish people celebrate Christmas? Jewish people do not celebrate Christmas, for Christmas is an annual commemoration of the birth of Jesus Christ, celebrated generally on December as a religious and cultural holiday by billions of people around the world. A feast central to the Christian liturgical year, it closes the Advent season and initiates the twelve days of Christmastide. Christmas is a civil holiday in many of the world's nations, is celebrated by an increasing number of people, and is an integral part of the Christmas and holiday season.

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A policeman asks a suspect in a murder investigigation about his alibi. The suspect gives him a solid alibi. The suspect go's home to his wife and have dinner.

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What do you call a fat Mexican? Whatever his name is.

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How did the ruttabaga believe itself to be a ruttabaga? Because it was in fact NOT a ruttabaga, but some self-aware individual with delusions.

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Your mother is so obese that the extra weight is putting strain on her knees she now needs knee surgery.

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What is as ugly as Justin Bieber's face? Justin Bieber's face.

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yo mamma so fat she seen a yellow train full of white people and she said stop that twinkie

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What do you call a Mexican man in prison? A prison officer.

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What is 69? A number that is before 70 and after 68

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What has 14 eyes, 14 legs, 70 toes and 7 noses... 7 people.

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What'd the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Just Dance 2 the video game

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Why happened when a clothes line walked into a bar? He got hung over

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what did one muffin say to the other in the oven? Nothing because they were both baked at 500 degrees and died

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Q: How do you get a kleenex to dance? A: Put a little boogey in it!

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Your mom is so fat, she has diabetes.

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That maternal figure of yours is of such inadequate intelligence that she cannot fathom that, given a scatterplot with a linear correlation of greater than -1 and lesser than 1 and a reasonably consistent rise over run, a future value along the y-axis can be predicted if following the y=a(x)+b equation.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why did we start questioning the philosophical reasoning of chickens?

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Jim fell of his bike, wanna know how. Someone threw a car at him. Knock knock, who's there, not Jim

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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