What's even faster than the speed of light? The speed you close out of porn when you hear someone coming into the room.

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I just made up a joke! How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Seven. The ending needs some work...

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Why was the girl crying? She got kicked in the vagina

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an invisible man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. No one noticed him cause hes invisible

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what do u call a hobo name Max Max

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Knock Knock Who's there (five gunshots)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

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??????????????(?)/// ????????(^0^)/

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? over 100

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*via text message* Me: Hey Trevor! You at home? Trevor: This is Trevor's mom. Trevor committed suicide today.. Me: OMG! Why?!? Trevor: Because when I gave him a glass of water, it had 3 ice cubes. Trevor doesn't like odd numbers.

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Why wasn't Pat able to get an erection? Because Pat is a girl.

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy, but you're getting too close And I'm about to file a restraining order, so back up, maybe?

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What do you call a black person who flys a plane? Well, first ask for their name, then address them as such.

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eye patch? Names

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What did the deer say to the hunter? Deers are animals, they haven't yet evolved enough to talk..

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Why doesn't the chicken wear pants? Beacuse its pecker is on its face.

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A peice of dust floats into a bar. Its a peice of dust so no one notices it.

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Yo' mama so retarded shes retarted!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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Why is Obama's name Obama? Obama

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Why can't stars marry? Because they are masses of incandescent gas and thus have no feelings.

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Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? He was blind.

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Disregard Females, Acquire Currency.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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