I LIKE TURLES.

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what is green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

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Why would anyone try to run from a fight if:Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog? I wasn't even talking about dogs and fight isn't something in you! Next time, don't listen to your football coach.

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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Why do black people love watermelon? It's simply delicious.

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Why did the woman make a sandwich? She was hungry

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How do you start up a good conversation? Wanna have a good conversation?

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whats worse then finding a finger in your soup? - being a cook and losing a finger

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What's the difference between a vegetable and my son? Nothing

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Q. What's black and white and red all over? A. Certainly not a newspaper. Nobody reads those anymore.

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minorities

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Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? Everyone on board died.

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a women picks up her phone and screams! There were 3 missed calls from her mother-inlaw

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whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? the wheelchair

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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What's the difference between an alcoholic and a drug dealer? An alcoholic is an extremely corrupted, and unhealthy living person. Though so is a drug dealer... They are both very harmful situations in many ways.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Whats black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white? A Nun falling down stairs

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person 1-As me if I'm purple... person 2- Are you purple? person 1- no

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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If you saw two cowboys in a kitchen, which would be the real one? Why do you automatically assume one of them is false, or that either of them is real?

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How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

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Knock Knock Who is there? You have no Dick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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