Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems don't rhyme, This one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister are in a boat in the middle of the lake when a lightning bolt flashes out of the sky and hits them. Fortunately, no one died because only about 10% of those struck are killed.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock knock? Whose there? Who's. Who's who? No you used the wrong form of who's.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

S.O.P.A

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, dogs can't speak English.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did Jim laugh so hard? Triangle!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are green Violets are green I'm colour blind Everything is green

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call postman pat when he is retired? Pat.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Baaaaaaahhhhhh

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you throw a drowning guitarist? An emergency floatation device.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock knock who's there? ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! dislike me!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Knock knock. Who's there? Ben. Oh hi! come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

When did the black man go to the pharmacy and why ? His wife , for whom he cared very much , had a cold and he had to get her prescription for her . On top of that , he had a horrible problem problem with painkillers that caused him to have an aneurysm on the way there .

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Whats the difference........ between a duck?

thumb_up thumb_down -34

your moms so fat she has a heart attack when she walks to the pantry.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What's the diference between an African guy and a lion? Nothing. But the lion will probably eat the African guy.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Why was the black man running down the street with a suitcase? He was late for work.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!!!!!!! why not?

thumb_up thumb_down -46

There were three hungry cows in a barn. One day, one of them finds a stick of butter on the ground, and notifies the other cows of his findings. Since the barn was ran like a democracy, the cows decided via 2/3 vote that the winner of the stick of butter should be decided by a checkers tournament. The problem is that there is no good way to run a checkers tournament with three cows because checkers is a one-on-one game. The first cow suggests trying to find another cow to join in so that they could have a bracket-style tournament, but there were only three cows that lived in the barn. The second cow suggests a round-robin style tournament. The third cow informs the second cow that there is a possibility of a tie because each cow can finish with one win and one loss among the two games in a round-robin tournament. The first cow suggests that the round-robin process can be repeated until there is a winner. This joint suggestion was approved by 2/3 vote by the cows. Finally the checkers tournament begins. The first cow says to the second cow, "you butter not beat me at checkers!"

thumb_up thumb_down -48

LOL i just pissed on Hitlers grave! Shoudn't killed the Jews BITCH!

thumb_up thumb_down -88

A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

thumb_up thumb_down -98

I slept with a girl with aids and now I do and so does everybody else I have sex with

thumb_up thumb_down -106

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops