There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children her uterus fell out.

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What's big, red and looks like a bucket? A small blue bucket labeled big red bucket.

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Roses are white Violets are white I did it in the garden

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LOL i just pissed on Hitlers grave! Shoudn't killed the Jews BITCH!

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Q: what did the boy get for Christmas A: a new wheel chair his legs were recently amputated due to the same cancer that killed terry fox.

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What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cos crossing the road usually doesn't work out too well for chickens.

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How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

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Why are you here? Because i'm not over there!

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Whats worse then your penis in your mouth? Your mom in your penis.

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Did you hear that Hellen Keller went driving? Now she's also paralyzed.

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What's funny and arousing? This joke.

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Have you ever had Kenyan food? Neither have they.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, we know you've been pirating movies.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas. A pool.

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haha.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

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How do you get a blonde to drown herself? Isolate her in an aqueous environment

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bartender says nothing. He was a mute.

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Why couldn't the orphans go on the field trip? Their parents couldn't sign the permission slip.

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Why didn't the man show up for work on Monday? He gets Mondays off.

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper with some red stuff on it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops