What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef What do you call a cow that's been chopped in half? Dead

Why did the rhino cross the rode? Because it was the chickens day off.

Knock Knock. Come in. -mattobrado

Why is jim gay? because he likes men

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn't have woman's rights Knock knock Who's there? NOT Sally, she's in the kitchen

What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Finding half a worm and wondering where the other half is. o.O

Gadaffi

Women's rights.

i said "what what in the butt, i said what what in the butt?"

Scenario: 2 guys with big feet and a camels Anus are hiking on Mount Everest with a set of elephants dildos Man 1: what's the difference between a Volkswagen and a clock? Man 2: what? Man 1: you can't toboggan of a green house roof with a tub of Vaseline and a ostrich party on lady gaga's Anus

Pirate ships are used by pirates.

A plane is flying from NY to Canada, but crashes on the border. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury survivors.... Just kidding, there were no survivors

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT SALLY.

When life gives you lemons, throw them away. Nobody likes lemons.

Life is like a box of chocolates, it doesn't last as long for fat people...

Q: Why did Rapunzel fall out of the tower? A: Because she was a dumb bitch.

A blonde girl walks into a screen door. She is blind.

If a quiz is a quizzical what is a test? It is an assessment intended to measure the respondents' knowledge or other abilities.

96

To mamas so fat shes fat

Listen I know you're a cat and I'm a cat but I know we can be friends

Knock Knock! Who's there? Osama Bin Laden. Oh wait...

Why did the indian man take the peanuts out of his lunch? Because he's allergic.

Why couldn't the cow move? It had Cystic Fibrosis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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