"So, how's life in North Korea?" "Well, I can't complain."

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What's big, grey and can't swim? A castle

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Why did the insect play marco polo? It couldn't. Marco polo requires multiple players.

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two philosophers stood in silence at the foot of a very large mountain; a mountain not only too high to climb, but also too wide to walk around. So the first philosopher finally speaks: "...so, what do you do for a living?"

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how did the bling man cross the street? He didn't half way there he tripped and got ran over by a car.

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Is your refrigerator running? Because your dad just hung himself

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OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

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A pregnant woman takes the bus, once inside she realizes that there are no seats. No one was pollite enough to let her sit down so she felt pretty uncomfortable on the way home.

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What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

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why does andy thomson speak that slow because he speaks that way

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What happened at the finish line of the marathon? People collapsed in exhaustion, it was a marathon.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your worst nightmare!! Ohh.... Do come in it's raining outside.

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What does mens "man sauce" and babies have in common? They're both fun to make and easy to kill...

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Three tomatoes are walking down the street... No wait, they're in my salad.

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AROUND

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Yo Aodhan yer hands smell of pish

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What is black, white, and red all over? Obviusly a sunburned panguin.

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Why was the asian so good with computers? Because he spent 8 years in college getting a doctorate in computer programming at the University of Hartford

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Why did the monkey sit on the toilet? To have a bowelmovement

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Why did the passenger plane crash? Well, if not mechanical failure or human error, probably because a bomb was detonated onboard.

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- If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. - You don't need to because N and O are already together. - Then maybe a cyber-relationship would work. - Why ? - Look at your keyboard, U and I are next to each other.

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I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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