Q:What did a young Arnold Schwarzenegger say when his friends wanted to play a game pretending to be 18th century composers? A: "I'll be Mozart!"

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An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

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Why did an abusive childhood affect the little boy's behavior? Beats me.

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What's the difference between a zombie, a vampire and a werewolf? One is a zombie, one is a vampire and one is a werewolf.

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

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a fat black man walks into an aquarium he enjoyed his day viewing many sea animals while buying a souvenier on his way out.

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Last week, I saw a film. As I recall it was a horror film.

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Knock Knock Who's There Ur Mom Ur Mom Who Ur Mom is Dead

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What is purple, covered in pus, and squeals? A purple hippo with an infected scab yelling at the pain

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Whats the difference between a horse and a pile of wheat? Its a pile of wheat.

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Pianca going ham

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my girlfriend keeps calling me a pedophile, thats a big word for a 3 year old

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A man walks into a doctor's office. He is diagnosed with cancer. After three years he dies.

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What is worse but similar to Jenga? The September 11th attacks.

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(insert Anti-Joke here)

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did you hear about the sidewalk? its all over town.

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What do you call 400 black men rolling down a hill? 400 black men rolling down a hill.

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Aodhan Hearty

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The undeveloped cerebral cortex vital for comprehending irony left the chicken incapable of finding humor or possibly feeling self-disgust in the acknowledgment that it had just wandered across said road, this being a grandfathered human jest.

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How do you drown a blonde? Hold her head under water.

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Once upon a time, there was boy. I saw this boy. So I sat on him.

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy There's the kitchen Sandwich maybe?

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Indeed.

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Did you hear about the black man who went to college? Me too! I'm so proud of him!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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