What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im really bad at poetry Your mums a whore

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why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

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Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

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So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

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A farmer accidentally trips his wife. She falls down the stairs and the farmer is quickly arrested for murder.

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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Knock knock, Who's there? Justin Bieber, LEAVE!

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Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

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There was 2 friends named Shutup and Trouble. They were camping and Trouble got lost in the woods. Shutup called the police. Shutup: Hello, is this 9-1-1 my friend is missing. Police: What is your name sir? Shutup: Shut up Police: What? Shutup: Shut up Police: What did you say? Shutup: I said Shut Up Police: Hey are you looking for TROUBLE? Shutup: Yes! Police: Guess what? We found him, he's safe in the station. We will have a officer come by a drop him off. Have a good day Mr. Shutup Shutup: Thank you

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if yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs?

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Hey look i just made a jo... shit.

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Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

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Q. why did the black man cross the road? A. Cause there is no law saying he cant

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac over off a cliff? A Cadillac seats 5

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What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

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What did the hooker say to the black guy? How long do you want it for?

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how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

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Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

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What did Helen Keller say? Obcojbcidjbcidjbdijcbd

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Roses are red Violets are blue, Eat my anus with a spoon.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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