Whats faster than a mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

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whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

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A man is at the doctor's waiting to be examined. The doctor walks into the room and takes one look at the man. The Doctor says, "You will need to stop masturbating." The man looks at him and says, "What, why?" The doctor says, "so that I can examine you"

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A Sodium atom walks into a bar. A Chlorine atom bumps into it, taking the electron, then making a bond. Suddenly, the police come in. They arrest the Chlorine atom, of course, but they also arrest the Sodium atom. He says, "what did I do?" The policemen say, "you're too ugly to be out in public."

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A Mexican and an African American are in a car, who is driving? The Mexican, while the African American rides in the passenger seat.

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Your mom is so fat her daily calorie intake is dangerously above the recommended 2000 per day.

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A person affected by Alzheimer's is asked a knock knock question- Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Wait what are we doing again?

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A man walks into a bar at 4:00 PM NO it was actually 4:01 because my clock is messed up and My dad likes cheese plus pie

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

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Q:What's similar between a squirel and a eagle? A:Both have wings, exept for the squirrel.

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What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

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What's black and white and red all over? A Nazi banner.

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Teacher- Pick the odd one out- Man, whale, bat, squirrel, frog Student- Whale. All others are found in Nebraska

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What color is Michael Jackson? Pale because he's dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I have a dead body, What do I do.

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Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

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Q: Whats worst than the Holocaust A: If a second Holocaust happened, and then you found an apple in your apple

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I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

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A Jew walks into a bar and says drinks are on me.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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whats worse than a leaf in your bed? World hunger, global warming, the economy......

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Knock knock! Who's there? A Doorbell salesman.

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how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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