What did the white man say to the black bartender? I'll have a pint please.

Boy: Why'd the chicken cross the road Mom: I don't know go ask the chicken

Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

YOUR MOMMA IS SO FAT WHEN SHE JUMPED FOR JOY........she didn't get stuck because there's nothing to get stuck in.

the awkward moment when you kill everyone in school and blame it on the fat kid

cool

Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

Your mother is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it read quite a large number. She resolved to live healthier and exercise more.

A horse walks into a bar. The Barman asks "why the long face?" The horse says "My son was recently killed in a horrific horse racing accident"

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant black scorpions.

Three ethnic minorities walk into a bar, and each does something involving alcohol that confirms a negative stereotype about his subgroup.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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