Why don't some black men have jobs? Because they won't work

Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

Actually it was me Josh brown

Three dogs are barking at a wall. People walk by thinking "Why are these dogs barking at a wall?".

what do you do with a drunken sailor? take him back to port because he's not in a right state of mind to be on board a moving vessel

why was 14 scared of 15? 7-8-9

How does a black guy die? Unknown

why did michele jackson rape a kid. because he was horny duhhhh!

A praying mantis is very graceful

A man walks into a bar. He then takes a step back and notices that his head hurts.

Whats the difference between a black man and a paraplegic? A paraplegic doesn't walk out on his family

What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Two Canadian men are sitting in a room. Man 1: Do you know what happens when you shoot a wolverine? Man 2: No. Man 1: It absorbs the bullets, duh. The second man proceeds to go outside with a gun. He returns in a few minutes. Man 1: What did you do with that gun? Man 2: I shot a wolverine. Man 1: What happened? Man 2: It fell over and died. I think you watch too much X-Men.

A woman walked out of the kitchen.

Why were black people mad about slavery? Because they didn't get paid in gum! Holt9 ;P

They found Michael Jackson dead in his house and found Madeleine McAnn in the cupboard 8P

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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