A man walks into a bar at 4:00 PM NO it was actually 4:01 because my clock is messed up and My dad likes cheese plus pie

Why do cows say moo? Because it's a cow

What has 2 legs, a heart and a conscience? YER MA

Something told me to write "vote pancakes" so I wrote "Vote Pancakes" it said it was wrong, and now I know why, capitals.

Wanna hear a joke? It's here somewhere You looked :D There ain't jokes on Antijoke.com

Three fish swim into a bar. The first one says "blub blub blub". The second one says "blub blub blub". The third one says "I'm not a fish I'm a human". What does the bartender say? Answer = Ayy Llmao _George_Bush_

What did the black boy wear for Halloween? A costume.

What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

Now on breaking news!: Man found hanged upside down in a forest with 403 lethal knife-stabs in his back! Policeman: "We have concluded this is indeed the worst case of suicide ever"

Thats the magic of Moral Man, I do not make people my bitches, they curl up and do it all for me. Moral: HEEEEEY BITCHEEEEEES! WAZZAAAAP!

what happened to the chicken who crossed the road he didn't realize that the light was green

What did the snowman say when winter was ending? -Nothing you dumbass

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? -Gave her a timeout

25

Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

Roses are red, Violets are red, I have a dead body, What do I do.

A guy forgot his 20th wedding anniversary. His wife was really mad, and said that she better have something in the driveway that goes from 0 to 350 in 10 seconds, and he quickly pulled out an AK-47 and murdered her violently.

What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

Matthew Wyckoff

What do you call a terrible Therapist that shoots coke up his nose? Sickman, Sickman Fraud.

dalas rof rezilitref taerg a si citsalp. Read it from right to left.

Why did the car stop working. The owner was unable to pay the outrageous price for gasoline and was forced to ride a bicycle to and fromvwork every day. Over the course of several months without being run, the engine seized and was forever broken.

What do you do when your wife is about have a baby? Throw her off the balcony go into parking lot and reach into her mouth if you feel a leg stab her in the belly button untill her intestines are coming out and burn the body singing Elmo's world

What's the best way to piss off a feminist? R@pe her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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