why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

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What did God say to Adam and Eve? Be fruitful

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What look likes a rocket, uses Mc Donalds wifi and takes off from Fairlawns Avenue Kevins House not instigating it was all Taggart

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A blonde drank an entire fruit smoothie in one sitting. She got a brain freeze.

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Why did the old man throw the clock out the window? Because he didn't want to go to a store that could repair it, so then he thought that it was better off on his yard where it could compost.

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A horse and a group of people are the jury in a courtroom. They are expected to vote yay or nay of whether a supposed robber is guilty or not. The jury goes into their room. They come out, and the people vote yay. The room turns to the horse. The horse states his objection very thoughtfully, and then leaves the room.

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Why couldn't the pirate go to the movies? He had scheduling conflicts

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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homosexual rights to marriage

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What's worse than having a retarded baby? Not having a baby

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A man sits on the toilet to take a shit And is surprised to find the next door neighbours dog in the toilet.

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What do you call a man in a wall? Stuck.

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So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

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What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

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Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours belong in the zoo But dont worrie ill be there Not in a cage But laughing at you

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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