- Anti Joke

what is the best way to stand out from the croud? open up your butt hole and take a video for to put on dat jumbotron

What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

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A 16 year old boy and girl have unprotected sex. The girl becomes pregnant and decides to keep the baby. They both drop out of high school, get lots of government cheese, and the boy holds a steady job as manager at the local mcdonalds for the rest of his life.

What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

Hey i just met you, and this us crazy! Heres some toilet paper, wipe my ass maybe?

Why did the black man cross the road? To escape from his owner.

A polish guy Is sick of being made fun of for his ethnicity, so he decides that he is going to act Italian thinking that no one makes fun of Italians. He stays home for weeks to practice this and one day walks out, up to a store and says"eh, get me some lasagna and zucchini !" the man at the store asks if he's polish.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

How do you confuse a Mexican? Stand in the middle of a crosswalk while shouting "Cthulu will rise!" whilst looking at the sky and playing "Everybody Have Fun Tonight" by Wang Chung. Works every time.

jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

There's a football player who walks into a bar and sees a gay guy. The gay guy says, "So you're a football player, right?" The football player says, "Yes." The gay guy says, "I have a game of football myself. It's called fart football. It's where you drink a mug of beer in less than five seconds and then you drop your pants and fart for the extra point." The gay guy goes first. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds and farts. The football player goes. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds then he drops his pants and before he farts, the gay guy says, "BLOCK THAT KICK! BLOCK THAT KICK!"

An Irishman and his sheep are locked in a barn together for 3 days. On the 3rd day his wife finally notices that he is gone, and comes looking in the barn for her husband. She liberates him, cooks him dinner, and they both laugh at the bestiality that occurred in the barn. 3 days is indeed a long time for anyone to endure.

Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

Whats white, fat, and looks like a horse? An albino horse who apparently has a high chance of diabetes.

roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

Why did Prius driver go to jail? Because he ran over someone and then fled the scene of the crime (at 11 mph)

Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

What does aaron eat for dinner Answer- Fat Finger HAHAHAHAHA

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

How did the black man survive the Train crash? He didnt, he died liked everyone else

Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

What did the Mexican shoe salesman say to the man? Excuse me, do you whih way to main street?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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