Haikus are good poems, They don't always make sense though, I saw a squirrel.

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Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

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A man is driving the speed limit of 55 on the highway. He gets pulled over and the cop says, "Do you know how fast you were going sir?" The man replies "Well yes I was going 55, the speed limit." The cop says, "No you were going 80." The speedometers broken.

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How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

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Who would win if Chuck Norris and God fought to the death? None they are both fictional.

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Your such a whore, you most likely cut your own clothes so people will see more of your body that they find physically attractive and make a partner for sex easier to obtain

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A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

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Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

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My cat just died.

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Why was the black person assassinated behind a drug dealers house? He was purposely shot in the leg and bled out before he could make it to help.

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whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

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Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

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What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

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If an ugly person got raped. What would that be called? Nothing. It is never gonna happen. Kelvin Yang.

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Yellow People !!

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What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

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What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

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What do you call a man in a wall? Stuck.

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What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A little boy falls into the mud Wanna hear a clean joke? He takes a bath with bubbles Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is Michal Jackson.

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I'm Polish.

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Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

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What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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