- Anti Joke

There was 2 friends named Shutup and Trouble. They were camping and Trouble got lost in the woods. Shutup called the police. Shutup: Hello, is this 9-1-1 my friend is missing. Police: What is your name sir? Shutup: Shut up Police: What? Shutup: Shut up Police: What did you say? Shutup: I said Shut Up Police: Hey are you looking for TROUBLE? Shutup: Yes! Police: Guess what? We found him, he's safe in the station. We will have a officer come by a drop him off. Have a good day Mr. Shutup Shutup: Thank you

My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

what did the philosopher say, when he considered the transient nature of life in relation to ones own personal and egocentric grasp upon circumstance and purpose? massive erection.

Your mama's so fat.... Her cerial bowl came with a lifeguard

Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

A black guy and a white girl are having sex. The white girl screams "I'm pregnant!!!!" The black guy says "i'll help you take care of it" "I love you sweetie and nothing will come between us"

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have said two factual statements.

Q:what do u call a dead baby tied to my feet? A:new shoes

Two bars walk into a guy, and the bartender says, "You're telling the joke wrong, stupid!"

i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea leaves for around 5 minutes in hot water.

How did the Cuban get into Florida? Well he got his passport and other papers, flew in, then went to Customs.

Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Whats long and black and goes around corners? The unemployment line.

Stop driving smart cars you fags

Roses are red Violets are blue The last time I saw your mom I made you

why did the black guy kill the white guy. the white guy killed his family.

whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

knock knock, who's there me me who he opens the door a kills yo

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm a fish out of water. Help me I'm suffocating.

LOVING BIRD DIEING BIRD DO NOT FLY AWAY

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

If atheism is a religion, then not collecting stamps is a hobby.