What do you call a fish with no eyes? Extremely vulnerable to predacious animals such as Brown Bears and Grey Herons

Why did the black man cross the road? To rape the girl on the other side.

Roses are gray Violets are gray I really wish That I wasn't color blind

Why did I get thumbs up from everyone? Answer: Because they like my anti-joke.

What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

Whats the difference between a monkey and another monkey? I dont know google it!

Brother : you see this hand Sister : yes Brother : if you dont leave ill slap you with it Sister : no you wont !SLAP!!!!

Imagine that we take all of the elephants in the world and laid them out end to end in space Did you know all of the elephants would die Nature fact

A guy forgot his 20th wedding anniversary. His wife was really mad, and said that she better have something in the driveway that goes from 0 to 350 in 10 seconds, and he quickly pulled out an AK-47 and murdered her violently.

Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

What is the one thing you can never steal back? Your viginity.

a dog walks into a bar....it sees the horse and starts barking which ever dentally startles and confuses the horse resulting in tables and chairs being knocked over .

what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

Theres a girl you like, and a you are playing football with friends. You see the girl about to get hit by the ball, but you catch it. She says "Your a life-saver" and hugs you "You scream touchdown!!!" to impress her, you spike the ball on the ground and it hits her in the face.

Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the turkey was in the oven and all the farm animals thought the chicken could run the errands in his place just fine.

a guy walks into a bar.. ouch

Why did the prestigious college accept the Native American student? Trick question, Native Americans don't exist anymore.

How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

Did you hear the one about the avalanche that crashed into the bar? It was such a tragedy.

What did the elephant say to the pelican? He didn't say anything. I lied.

So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

Why did the man ask the IPhone to marry him He was smoking weed

Knock knock, Who's there? The constable. Your husband was killed in a car crash.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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