Why did Biggie Smalls eat so much dark chocolate? His doctor suggest that he eat foods high in fiber.

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Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

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What happens if a Muslim leaves their bag on a bus? They quickly return onto the bus and get it.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? The IRS. All your base are belong to us.

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What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

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What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

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Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

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Why didn't the mexican make the basketball team? He had never practiced and was overweight

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What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

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How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

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A black man is trapped inside a bottle, how does he get out? He doesn't it is simply impossible for a human to get trapped inside a bottle.

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Why did the old man die? He was old.

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Why couldn't the boy watch the DVD about pirates? Because his mother did not understand the importance of putting the disc back in it's case after use, and as a result, has become too damaged for the DVD Player to play.

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A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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Why did the boy have to ride the bus? Because both his parents died.

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A man jumped off a bridge. He went bungee jumping with his family and had a great time.

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Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

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Disreguard Females Aquire Currency

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Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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Whats worse than driving a Ford Taurus? Driving two Ford Taurus'

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What did the T Rex say to the pterodactyl? ROIRWR!!!

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What's as hard as a rock? A rock

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops