Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

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So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

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Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

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I have a dirty joke. Poop.

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I am green. You are blue. Jokes are infinite. This is too.

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do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

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how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

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I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

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Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

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Gay rights.

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What colour is a black man in a freezer black

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A man with no legs walks into a bar. Just kidding...

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Roses are red Violets are blue Hop in the van or I will rape you

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Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

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Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

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What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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1,000 people get out of a plane , who hits the ground first? The DEAD guy!!!!

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. There is a frog in his beer.

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What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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What do you call a fridge painted red and brown? A fridge.

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You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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