What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs? Nothing, it cant come

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What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown? I don't know... That action was so barbarous that it freaked me out, and I was no longer in the vicinity of the area. Since I don't have supersonic hearing, I couldn't pick up anything they were saying...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted tobe cool, But I look like you

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What is the difference between a Homosexual and a Heterosexual? They are both Black.

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3 guys get stuck in a island and find indians and the indians say the three guys have to stick 10 of the same fruits up there or they die. The first guy came back with oranges but stops at 3 then gets killed. the second had grapes and stop at 2 and gets killed. But in heaven the first guy ask why did you stop at 2 there grapes. the second guy said he saw the third with a pineapple.

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How did the cat get outside? It fell out the window

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Why did Prius driver go to jail? Because he ran over someone and then fled the scene of the crime (at 11 mph)

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I am back with more jokes! -Lets go Mets It is best to dislike this one

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guess what what ...

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Yo mama's so ugly, she has difficulty attracting a partner.

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How many electricians with a suitable ladder does it take to change a bulb? If the bulb fitting is now obsolete it may not be possible.

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What is worse than catching someone trying to cheat by looking at your exam? Getting struck by lightning.

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So theres a Black guy, White guy and Mexican guy all sitting at a bar. They were friends.

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Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

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What do you call two black people in the same sleeping bag? A newly married couple on their camping adventure honeymoon.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause fuck you thats why

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Two elephants were in a bathtub. One elephant asks the other "pass the soap?" The other elephant passes him the soap and they continue with their bath.

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Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

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oh no a butt!!!!!!!!!! your stubid oh wait your right ahhhhhhhhhh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops