What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

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Do you know what hurts? An abortion.

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open it up and stick him in. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Take out the elephant and put in the giraffe.

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how did the snake fly? it couldnt snakescant fly

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? Three bee stings. Whats worse than three bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Four bee stings.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Ask me if I'm wearing pants. Are you wearing pants? Yeah.

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yo mama is so fat, she's obeise

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In order to find a woman, you need time and money. Woman=Time&Money The longer you spend at work, the more money you get. Time=Money Money is the root of most problems in the world today. Money=Problems Therefore Women=Problems

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Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

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Why did the chicken cross the road? You reading another one of these again?

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An Irishman walks into a bar.....Duh.

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What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

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ok when a fat person say he on a diet i said your on a sea food diet what evert you see you eat now get back to school John f kennedy students

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

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Q.How many babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb A.Babies are to young to screw in lightbulbs

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i'm an inbred jew - Barras

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What is black and white and has 4 wheels? A zebra, I lied about the wheels

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roses are red violets are red i smell my wife nows shes dead

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What did the cop say to his belly? "Hey in there!"

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Q:why did the guy go to the doctor? A:I dunno, he must have gone for a good reason

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Three Jewish men walk into a butcher. They dont buy any pork products and thank the butcher for his services.

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A blonde walks into a bar therefore her face hurts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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