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What did the snowman say to the other snowman? Do you smell carrots?

What's worse than forgetting to charge your cell phone battery? Getting wrongfully accused and going to jail and get raped by inmates for the rest of your life.

"I see" said the blind man to the deaf man... On the phone

There are two parrots sitting on a perch. One parrot says to the other parrot, "Do you smell fish?"

Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

what do u call a joke with no punchline? A non-harmful joke

how do you make a plumber cry? pull up his pants....

Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Niether did she

what's blue , and you can urinate it? a rim block.

why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black guy on a bike? Just because its not very nice.

what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying

Before Marriage: Boy: Ah at last. I can hardly wait. Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No don't even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of Course. Always have and always will. Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: Never. Why are you even asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get. Girl: Will you hit me? Boy: Hell no. Are you crazy? Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling! After Marriage: (Read from bottom to top)

What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

Why did the chicken cross the road...

My cat just died.

what's the difference between northerners and southerners? southerners live to the south of birmingham, and they don,t stink of urine.

whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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