A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a canoe at him.

Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed because of the fact that he had lost World War II.

Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

If a train leaves Chicago at 50 miles per hour, how hard does the baby strapped to the tracks get splattered?

What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I am a dog.

So this guy was making a sandwich...

Bro: Aww Dawg! What if they tell me I got da aids? Dawg!: Hey don worry bro, you gotta BE POSITIVE

whats worse than finding out there's mold in your bread? finding out the holocaust is in your bread

Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

What were the murderer's last words before he was put to death by electric chair? "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH NNNNNFHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.................................................................................................................." He then defecated in his pants.

What's worse than falling out of a tree and landing on a dog? Rape.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police. Come out with your hands up!

What do you call a black priest? Father, and then whatever his name happens to be.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

what happens when chuck norris loses his hokey-bar? your mother

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ now I know my ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ no I know my ABC etc:

How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

whats worse than 2 jews 3 jews

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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