*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

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What is the difference between a trampoline and a baby? You take your boots of before jumping on the trampoline!!!!!!!!!

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What do you call a mexican man with a rubber toe? Ruberto.

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My uncle got hit by a truck, what was the last thing to go through his mind? The drive shaft.

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whats worse than getting lost in europe? becoming the middle in the human centipede.

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Why couldn't the black guy support his family? He was only 3 years old.

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there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

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Why was the boy afraid? Because he had just seen his dog get ran over by a tractor

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? He needed money to feed his family and to pay for his daughter's college education.

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How many teachers would it take to find their way out of a maze? Depends on their area of speciality. If the teacher(s) are mathematicians or logicians, probably one or two at most. If they are home economics teachers, possibly more.

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died

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I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

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What did the blind man say to the mentally challenged man when he bumped into him? Watch where you're going, retard.

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When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

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Your mamma so jobless, that she needs a job! ~T.J.C.S.

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What do you call a chicken with no feathers, no guts, and no head? Fried chicken

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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Santa and smart blond jump off a building who lands frost none nethither exist

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Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

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A blonde and a brunette are walking down a street. What a great way to parade and recognise the various colours that lie upon ones head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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