A man walks into a house, and the next day was taken to the hospital for a minor concussion and a possible vision deficiency.

What happened to the pig? It got turned into bacon like every other pig.

What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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Did u hear about the jew that bought something not on sale? Neither did i.

What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Because her mother inadvertently left the gate open while gardening.

Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Pfft. Stupid. Apples are for healthy people. Go for the ice cream. There's no worms in that.

What did Billy say to Jesus when he died? Nothing he went to hell. -Austin Conradt

A muslim man takes a flight to New York. He lands safely at JFK airport.

What is the similarity between John W. Booth and Pee Wee Herman? They both got arrested for shooting someone in the back of the head in the theater.

Q: Billy has 47 pieces of cake, he eats 38. What does he have left? A: Diabetes

Why doesn't the chicken cross the road Because his dad got ran over by a car when he crossed the road

What happened to the Asian who ran into the wall with a boner? He ejaculated his sperm, impregnating the wall. The wall went to the authorities, and the man was charged with rape. He is now serving a 10 year prison sentence, with no possibility of parole.

So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is actually a really good question which leads me to wonder why the farmer let the chicken out in the first place.

When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

how long does it take chuck norris to watch a 24 hour video 24 hours

What do you get when you put a woman in a room with 4 guys? She gets Gang Banged.

a boy walks into a hospital ward, and procedes to break down into tears because his family died

What comes after 7? Pedophiles.

Why did the black guy lose the race? He toke an arrow to the knee

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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