Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

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A Black Child just received his ivy-league diploma and hugged his dad.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a bmw? I don't have a bmw in my garage.

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People really hate it when sentenses don't end the way elephants wear hats

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What's better then one dead baby in a tub? Many things a dead baby is a tragedy.

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Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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what do you call the quadriplegic man who went water skiing? Skip

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus. Why did the bus crash? It hit a boy eating an ice cream cone.

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How can you know your roommate is gay? His dick has the taste of shit

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what happened to the chicken who crossed the road he didn't realize that the light was green

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My grandma's star sign was cancer, and it was really ironic how she died, actually... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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Why was the man attracted to other men? Because he was gay, and that is typically what happens when people are attracted to members of the same sex, and it is as natural as a man being attracted to women.

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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What headphones does the farmer use? He is going through a financial struggle at the moment and cannot afford such a luxury.

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A priest and a small child enter a bar. The bartender takes his son back from the priest, paying him $30 for his exemplary babysitting services.

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Q: What is every blonde's ambition? A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue.. And IDGAF!

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So let's pretend two men that had been friends for a very long time, one man asks the other man how he is, so the man tells the other man how he is doing. Then that man asks the other man how he is doing. The two men were engaged in a very interesting conversation. What did the men do next? Nothing. We're pretending, remember?

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Whats the definition of not winning? Charlie sheen losing custody of his son because he is a coked out, old man douche bag, who only gets told what he wants to hear because he forks out lots of money to gold digging hookers.

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I can prove I'm a psychic - this post is going to receive a lot of dislikes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he needed to go home.

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when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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