i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

I cant find my anti-jokes this is also one

What's black and white and red all over? A greyish red object.

Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my basement.

Why Was the student driver using his cell phone in the car? Because he had gotten in a mild accident with a midsized sedan so he was quickly dialing his AAA agent for roadside assistance so he can get back to his loving family and three children

What do you call a Welshman with a stick up his arse? A very odd man

A man came home from work and said to his wife im going to kill u

What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

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A neutron walks into a bar. The barman says, "for you, no charge." The neutron replies, "very funny asshole, you're just going to put it on my tab after I pass out."

What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

I dyed my armpit hair blue yesterday because I wanted to start a new trend. My boyfriend later broke up with me.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Orange. Orange Who? No, this is Homeland Security. We have raised the current terrorism threat level to Orange, which means there is a high risk of terrorist attacks. Please report any suspicious behavior.

Mr Mac reminds me that no matter how hard you try you will always lose your hair

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

What do the Africans have for breakfast? Nothing.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

Why did Jimmy fall over? Jimmy was hit by a bus.

Blind jokes are not funny! I just don't see the humor in them

What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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